How To Stop Attracting Undesirable Partners

relationships and attraction

Have you ever wondered why you keep attracting the same set of undesirable partners into your lives? Well, you are not alone.

Relationships, as alluring and mesmerizing as they may feel, are often sometimes accompanied with frustrations, and lots of indescribable complications. One of these complications could be attracting or getting involved with the same set of unwanted/undesirable partners constantly.

You just can’t seem to figure out why the cycle never stops. The last two boyfriends you were engaged with committed the same offence. They just wouldn’t stop lying.

In fact, your current boyfriend is no different than your annoying ex-boyfriend you recently broke up with. they both cheated on you. The only difference you can spot is in their looks. But the personality remains the same. Why is this so? Why are they all always jackasses? It’s not fair to you.

No, it is definitely not fair to you (or anyone else for that matter) to keep getting wound up with the same jackasses they once swore never to get involved with again.

How do we approach this?

Let’s start from here- There is a saying that if you want to get something you have not gotten before you must be willing to do something you have never done before. Are you getting the picture yet?

To attract someone you have never attracted before, you must become something that you have not been before. So, what am I insinuating? You need to change! Human beings are like magnets, we attract what we are to ourselves. Maybe you have something in you that keeps drawing these set of people that you do not want into your life. You need to admit that and begin to work on it ASAP.

One of the most difficult acknowledgments for humans is the one that points to us as the problem. We prefer believing that the third party is the problem than to admit that we are the problem. It is easier having something to take the fault than for us to be the fault.

You keep attracting stingy partners, could it be that you’re stingy, or you demand too much? You attract unloving partners, do you show and give enough love yourself? Lying partners, are you certain that you are not hard to open up to? Angry partners, do you provoke them, do you upset them? Are you difficult to deal with?  Remember, you’re supposed to bring out the best in your partner and not the worst.

It is quite difficult to do away with old habits, which is why every now and then it is important to check and examine ourselves to discover where and what our lapses are.

If all we see in every one we have ever been in a relationship with is their flaws, then we really need to check and re-assess ourselves. If we are the problem, then the change definitely needs to come from us.

Because the bitter truth is, if we are the problem and we do not address it, we will undoubtedly keep encountering the same challenge in every relationship we get into. And the earlier we start taking responsibility for our actions, the better we handle them, and the sooner they’re being resolved.

So, press pause! Take a break from relationships and work on yourself. One year, two years, continue for as long as it takes for you to start seeing positive changes. Be single for a while. Enjoy every moment of your singleness, and use that opportunity to work on the areas of your life that need adjustment and correction. Remember, the change starts with you. You must start with the man in the mirror!




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