5 Subtle Signs Of An Emotionally Unavailable Partner

If you’re in a relationship and constantly wonder why you always have to be the one doing it all -the calling, the texting, the planning, the apologizing – you might have very well fallen into the hands of an emotionally unavailable partner.

Trust me, this is not a situation you want to continue staying in. It’s toxic and mentally unhealthy.

You’d be surprised at how much people out there have a phobia (fear) for commitment in relationships.

It’s not their fault though, they just don’t have what it takes to sustain emotional bonds – this condition could be temporary or permanent.

Of course, these set of people often prefer to keep things casual and often use the phrase, ‘let’s see how it goes. This is a dangerous statement to make in any relationship.

While some are cognizant of this fact, some aren’t and may even be in a relationship as they’re unaware that they suffer from this syndrome.

The sad thing is, their significant partner tends to suffer. Because they never feel loved or fulfilled in such a relationship, to begin with.

Read More: 20 Basic Questions To Discuss Before Entering A Relationship With Him/Her

Below are the 5 important but subtle signs that you need to watch out for in your relationship to identify an emotionally unavailable partner – and that partner may even be you.

1. They Appear ‘Lazy’ 

A partner who truly wants you is ready to go the extra mile for you even if it’s not something they enjoy doing.

For instance, perhaps you love a good morning text, or your love language is the word of affirmations, if this significant partner is interested in making the relationship work like you are, they will have no problem meeting these needs.

However, someone who’s emotionally unavailable will care less about you because they’re not bothered with losing you- they are just not ready to make it work.

2. They Don’t Open Up 

A similar trait of someone who is but isn’t mentally fit to be in a relationship is the fact that they are not motivated to share anything with you. They avoid having a deep or future conversation with you.


We all have our secrets, yes. But some things need not be hidden from your partner, except, of course, you don’t feel attached to them. And why’s that? Because you’re not serious about them and are not ready for a commitment.

If this sounds like you, or someone you’re in a relationship with, it’s time to have a serious discussion with them or yourself.

3. They Always Make Excuses 

Does your partner have difficulty keeping to plans? Are they fond of canceling on you each time you fix a date or hangout? Do you always have to remind them of your birthdays? Do they make sacrifices for you? Or do they promise to call but never actually do until you remind them? Only for them to come up with feeble excuses as to why they couldn’t meet up…always.

Recognizing these subtle signs can save you from wasting your time on someone who’s about to waste yours.

4. They Disappear On You And Return 

Emotionally unavailable partners go on and off in relationships. Often they only return when they’re bored and not because they’re ready.

So, watch out for someone who consistently pulls away and tries to squeeze their way back into your life after a while.

It might be a sign that they’re only using you to kill time and not because they are interested in making things work with you.

5. They Tell You 

When people tell or show you who they are, please believe them without second-guessing or making up excuses for them.

This is good news if someone tells you they’re unavailable for an emotional connection. When you hear this, believe them and steer clear.

Don’t even wait around trying to fix or hope they might change their mind.

Instead, be eternally grateful to them for being honest and saving you from terrible experiences that are capable of leaving you emotionally broken and shattered in the long run.

Read More; How To Stop Attracting Undesirable Partners

In conclusion, being in a relationship with a mentally unstable individual is one of the most dangerous things to your health.

The more you think you can and try to get through to them, the harder you hit a brick wall. It’s like shooting a bullet on a bulletproof. Unless they remove it, you can’t get through.

You’ll agree with me that without a strong emotional connection, there are no healthy relationships.

So, if you find the above signs in your partner, a considering partner, or even yourself, talk to them (or yourself) as they (you) may not even realize this.

Then give them a chance to change and watch out for any improvement.

But if they refuse to admit that they have a problem or change, it’s time to have a long rethink about such a relationship.

Your mental health is crucial to your well-being. Give it up for no one.

Read More; Why She Isn’t Replying Your Texts

Did you enjoy reading this article? Give it a like and share it with a friend.

What other signs of an emotionally unavailable partner do you know that aren’t mentioned above?

Be sure to share with us in the comment section below ❤️  It’s always a pleasure reading from you.

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